The Fine Line Between Stress and Total Hysteria

I've been back a brief two days from my glorious trip to Cali and already loathing the Florida heat and humidity. Blargh. But, I have no time to bitch about that because in a few hours I'm heading off to Boston for a wedding!

That's right, I'm going to chill with Monkey and attend her sister's nuptials. I'm super excited because this is actually the first wedding I've ever gone to. When I tell people this they give me a look that says, "Oy, are you a freak or what?" I suppose it might seem odd that at the advanced age of 27 I have yet to see anyone get married. But that's how it is. Anyway, I'll finally have a wedding to add to my roster and from everything I've been told I'm anticipating that it will be so spectacular that I won't really need to go to a wedding ever again. I'll have seen the best and the brightest first off. Yay!

All happiness and joy aside...I think I've finally entered the full blown anxiety state that accompanies every Ph.D. candidate's entrance onto the job market. Honestly, I'm freakin' out and it's not quite July yet. But I've already seen job ads with October 2nd deadlines, which means:

1. I have about 2 months to complete drafts of 2 more chapters.
2. I will be attempting to do this while concurrently teaching a summer class and devising a syllabus for my fall class (a new one).
3. I need to get cracking on finishing my draft of a cover letter and making my CV spiffy.
4. I should be sending out a shortened version of the chapter I'm currently revising to some journals and try to add another publication to my list.
5. I must contact all my committee members, update them on my status, get them to read some material, and prostrate myself before them in order to get brilliant letters of recommendation well in advance of the typical November job application deadlines.

I'm not sure why, but recently some departments have started making their application deadlines MUCH earlier than is standard. Usually one needed to submit the first round of materials (CV, cover letter, abstract) in early to mid November. Now it seems that more universitites are requesting ALL materials, up front, by the beginning of October. This is a bit stressful. Largely because so many professors are used to the November deadlines and are not exactly jumping with joy at having to write reference letters right at the start of the fall term. I feel like I can have all of my stuff ready, but will I be able to get the kind of letters I need that much in advance? I sure as hell hope so. Although I am a bit worried about one of my committee members...but that's a whole different stressful situation that I don't care to go in to today.

In the face of this stress load, which is making me mildly hysterical these days, I do have one shining ray of happiness. My articles is out! Woot! I got my complimentary copies of the journal in the mail the other day and spent about ten minutes just staring at it. The surreal nature of the experience cannot even be put into words. But seeing my work in print for the first time was both thrilling and frightening. The whole process has taken about one year to bear fruit, and so it started to seem like this abstract event that would eventually happen in some distant future but not any time soon. Holding the finished product in my hand, therefore, nearly sent my mind reeling. But it was also a huge relief because now I've got a major publication under my belt and some of the pressure is off. I now have much better chances of getting a job. A fact of which I shall have to remind myself daily once the job hunt commences in earnest.

California Luv...

Well, dear readers, I have been having a lovely time out here in California. The conference in Oakland went very well. I even had a fruitful chat with one of the assistant editors for NYU Press who sounded interested in my dissertation and invited me to submit a book proposal! Big excitement to be sure--I can't wait to tell my director about that. I must admit, however, that I sort of blew off the last day of the conference in order to spend time with my good friend Catherine in San Francisco. This of course reminded me just how much I LOVE the Bay area. While I have grandiose fantasies about potentially getting a job out here, I am realistic enough to know that it would be financially impossible to live in the city. (sigh)

But Catherine currently lives right on the outskirts of Japan Town, so we took time to explore there and eat some delicious food that made us both nostalgic for our respective times in Japan. We had dinner at this fabulous noodle shop where I was able to get "Croquette Mash Curry Udon" for the first time since I left Tokyo. And damn, it was SO good! Basically, this dish consists of a big bowl of the thick udon noodles, rich curry sauce (mmm!), and two lightly breaded and slightly sweet mashed potato patties. I know it might sound a little strange, but it's amazingly tasty.

After dinner, we found a little place that made Japanese crepes and I got one filled with fresh strawberries, whip cream, and chocolate sauce. Needless to say, I was having a little food-gasm for the rest of the night!

Unfortunatley, the Kinokuniya bookstore I wanted to hit up was closed by the time we got there so I had to delay my shopping expedition until the following morning (at which time I was able to pick up quite a few manga that I'd been looking for, yay!).

Anyway, Catherine and I also found a karaoke bar where we were able to rent out a private room and sing for a few hours. Segoi!

The next day I ran out first thing in the morning to check out the bookstore and then I found a great little cafe that makes taiyaki! As many of you know, taiyaki is my FAVORITE Japanese dessert of all time. It's basically their version of a donut (in the shape of a fish) filled with gooey red bean paste. Mmmmm! It was heavenly.

On Saturday we wandered around the city and just had fun hanging out. It was really great to spend time with Catherine because I hadn't seen her in person for nearly 5 years, which is quite a long time even for both us who tend to travel a great deal.

Ass early Sunday morning I made my way back to the airport and flew down to L.A. to stay with Monkey for a little over a week. So far I've been having a great time lazing about, enjoying the gorgeous California weather, and catching up with her and my friend Charlie. Monkey has been feeding me all kinds of delicious food as well. I've had the good fortune to sample the "crack cauliflower" which I am now a total addict for. Damn that shit is good! I've also had delicious dosa (made with crepe batter, so she's calling it "fauxsa") and palak paneer. Last night we went out for sushi and on Saturday we're making plans to go to Little Tokyo to sample the fare at a well reviewed izakaya. In Japan, izakayas are a cross between a bar and a restaurant that tend to serve a Japanese style tapas. Finger foods and alcohol mostly. But this place apparently makes one of my all time favorite Japanese dishes--okonomiyaki! I can't wait for Monkey to try this stuff because I think she's going to love it almost as much as I do.

Tonight I'm going out for dinner with Charlie, but I'm not sure where as yet. No doubt, we will spend much of the evening reminiscing about our high school follies and talking about the comics we're currently reading, movies we want to see, and music we like.

My time here in Cali is flying by and I know, all too soon, I'll have to head back to the armpit of Florida to swelter in it's oppressive humidity. (sigh) But for now, I'm feeling the California luv while I can...and trying to ignore how my credit card is weeping at the thought of our next bill.

A Few Words from Me and My Muse

Tomorrow I head off for the familiar climes of Cally-for-ny-aye. Woot!

I'm attending an academic conference in Oakland and spending a day with my friend Catherine in San Francisco, then I'm heading down to L.A. for a week of vacation fun time with my good friend Monkey! While there, I hope to discover the delights of her dairy wenching skills and sample the fruits of her labor. I'm thinking we need to make some delightful baked goat cheese one night for certain.

Of course, while Monkey is toiling away in her lawyery manner each day I plan to get some work done on my dissertation. I've got a chapter to revise and a draft of my cover letter for jobs to get through while I'm there. At the same time, however, I'm hoping to spend some time on my novel(s).

That's right, I'm sure you all thought my creative brain powers were off skulking in some corner ne'er to return. Sometimes I *almost* wish that were the case. In fact, it has been quite the opposite. My inner would-be author has been laying a number of fictional eggs in a well-protected mental nest. I've taken to carrying around a little black book to jot down ideas in because I'm just brimming with material. Honestly folks, I have outlines and notes for about seven different projects apart from the series I'm already working on. It's exciting but also a tad overwhelming, especially since my inner would-be author wants to write fiction when I know I need to be writing my dissertation.

We've been battling it out rather ferociously of late, and I've managed to momentarily satisfy my evil twin for the moment with my little book of notes. Just getting out those ideas on paper has assuaged her, but I don't know for how long. It's incredibly frustrating because I enjoy my research and I know I need to get it done so I can find a job that actually pays and has benefits, but at the same time the other half of me wants to be a full-time author. Perhaps that will be in the cards somewhere later down the road, but I need financial security first!

I have made some excellent headway on revisions for novel #1. I've actually made some significant changes to the plot and I've been editing for overall readability, fleshing out characters, and tying up loose ends. I think it's going to be a much better end product once I'm done, and believe me, I will be sending out email attachments to all my pals who volunteered to read and give me feedback. You guys rock! :)

Sadly, in the meantime, novel #2 has not progressed. I wanted to finish up changes on #1 before going any further with #2, lest I have to totally cut out things that will no longer work. But I promise, once #1 is revised I will be returning to #2 (especially as those of you who read the first raw version of #1 were already psyched for the sequel, bless your hearts).

So, the blog will undoubtedly remain silent until I return toward the end of this month. Until then, peace out! And let us hope my muse and I shall be able to co-exist and write together in harmony over this vacation.

On Decidedly Odd Library Encounters and Joaquin Phoenix...

So today I had a myriad of errands to run around town and one of those was picking up some books at the university library that I had requested. As some of my dear readers know, our main humanities library has been closed for three years while undergoing massive reconstruction and renovation. Supposedly it is going to reopen in the next few months but I still think they're lying. I've lost the hope y'all. They said it was going to re-open in January 2006 and it never happened. As the months passed my fleeting optimism waned. Now I think I'll be lucky to actually get in there and peruse a stack before I graduate. But I digress...in the meantime, any time students need books formerly housed in the humanities library they have to request them online and wait 24 hours for them to be delivered from a storage facility to the main science library. I avoid this library like the plague because it is downright inhospitable. It reminds me a lot of the movie Office Space. Cubicles, bad flourescent lighting, ugly monochromatic carpeting and matching furniture. In a word...dreary. And entirely too corporate for my liking. But alas, I must go there to pick up books when I request them.
But I had a rather unusual encounter when I went to check out my library books today. Now, I had heard tell from Violet some time ago that there was a lad manning the circulation desk who bore a striking resemblance to Joaquin Phoenix.
I must admit, I took this tale with a dubious grain of salt as Violet also tried to convince me at one time that a very Fabio-esque porn star looked "just like Joaquin Phoenix." When I pointed out that he in fact looked like Fabio (which others concurred with me on), she defensively asserted that said porn star still looked like Joaquin "a little around the eyes." This, of course, is a frequent point of considerable humor for me and I shamelessly tease her about it. :) But through the grapevine, I'd heard from a few other sources in our department that there was indeed a strapping young bloke who looked like Joaquin working at the library. I didn't really pay it much consideration until I went to check out my books today and this mesmerizing guy was right in front of me.

The first thought in my head was, "Hot damn! He does look like Joaquin Phoenix!" Kind of like a younger, lighter haired version of Joaquin circa To Die For. I didn't manage to say much at first aside from "hi," but I quickly discovered that I'd interrupted a conversation that had been going on because the guy working next to him at the circulation desk suddenly says, "Man, I'm telling you. You need to dye your hair black. I mean, walk the line dude. Become Joaquin Phoenix!" This, quite understandly, sent me into gales of sudden laughter. Look-alike boy was very embarrassed and discomfited by this whole conversation and looking for a way out. So, naturally, he looks right at my breasts and says, "Oh...wow, that's...a neat T-shirt." (The front of this T-shirt says "I *heart* boys...") Then he points to the guy beside him and says, "so does he."

Okay, so I'm feeling a tad out of my depth here. Then I realize perhaps I'd interrupted a flirtation from his co-worker that Joaquin look-alike boy felt uncomfortable with. So, being unable to resist toying with him I pointed out, "oh, well you didn't see the back of the shirt." I then turned around to show them the back, which has a great yaoi image of two cute manga guys kissing and the words "with other boys."

Let's just say, I left the two wee laddies flabbergasted and speechless, while my inner she-demon was cackling with amusement. All in a day's work I suppose.

But damn if that boy didn't look uncannily similar to Joaquin Phoenix! I may have to visit that library more often in spite of it's soul killing interior decor....